Road to Rwanda----A Wedding

 

Last Saturday our dear household worker got married. Clementine had invited us to be her surrogate parents for the wedding, but we knew enough to say we could not do that! However, I ended up as the honorary grandmother. 

At first she said we needed to arrive at 8. I questioned that and she finally said, "OK, 9".  And then of course, our part of the ceremony did not happen until 1.  Not unexpected.  I was put at the front of the procession of about 20 "bridesmaids" who carried in presents, etc. I had no idea what I was to do, but followed directions the best I could, leading the whole group down the white carpet to stand to the side to wait for the bride. (I put on my best wedding smile and led.  When I finally stood to the side and saw all those behind me, they were extremely serious...almost dour.  I tried to erase the smile, but by that time I almost had the giggles and had a hard time.  The bride was completely serious as she was led down the aisle by her surrogate father.....I guess this is a more serious than joyful occasion?) Rick and I were called forward to receive a present FROM the bride to us? Lovely giraffe carvings.  The bride left to change her clothes to go from this part of the ceremony (the negotiation of the dowry) to the church wedding.  We all enjoyed a nice buffet supper....served in the middle of a rain storm.  Although the food was out in the rain storm, the rest of us were under tents and being one of the older bridesmaids, someone brought me my food. After our 4 hours of participation, Rick and I bowed out after the meal.  We knew that after the church wedding, which ended about 6, they then would return to this location and have the reception....until who knows what time?  

I have this secret, deeply embedded fear that I will be stuck at an event somewhere in a language I don't understand and with customs that are not part of my experience and that I will be there for hours and hours and hours.  Someone has characterized a Rwandan wedding as taking the same amount of time as a cross-Atlantic flight, and that is pretty accurate.  I survived and even enjoyed most of this wedding, mainly because it was honoring our dear friend.